Competitive cyclists know all about the "Posties," Team Telekom, ONCE, and Credit Agricole among others. But who they probably have not heard of is the up and coming Team FTN from Central Arkansas. Ok, so maybe I'm just exaggerating *a little bit* here, but from what I witnessed this weekend, Team FTN would give any of these teams a run for their money...if FTN had a 5,234,432 mile headstart, that is. ;)

The core FTN team members consisted of Rex, Jim, Andrew, Jason, and myself. Having just gotten my bike dusted off from months of disuse, I was looking forward to tackling the wilderness at Camp Robinson. However, despite all the careful planning that went into this first excursion, I arrived shortly after 9am at "camp" to find it closed for hunting and a few of the team members waiting for me. Backup Plan 2A.502 was then initiated as we followed Rex to the covered bridge at Burns Park where the rest of Team FTN would be waiting.

A few moments later, after unloading bikes, stowing gear, and 3 changes of clothes (thank you Jason), we were finally ready to set off. Rex first led us on a nice, easy warm-up ride through the woods. I guess he didn't want to wear out us not-quite-in-shape cyclist-wannabes (like myself) right from the get go. The weather was perfect - bright sunny skies with only a light breeze (at *this* point). The leaves crunched underneath our fat grippy tires and made a *thwick thwick thwick* sound as they got stuck in the various nooks in our cycling componentry. What was once cool as a kid (remember putting playing cards in your bicycle spokes?) was now downright annoying.

We rode a while further in the woods navigating carefully between the trees, occasionally having to portage over large fallen logs (or like me on a few occasions, trying to bunny hop over them but failing miserably). Then Rex decided to give us a break from the natural obstacles as he led us up a road toward the crest of the hill. Coming from the other direction was a Serious Biker (TM) by the looks of him. We all turned to look at him in awe as he zoomed by. He did look awfully familiar....

This was followed by this somewhat-familiar-Serious-Biker (TM) slamming on his brakes as he skidded gracefully to a stop (how do they do that?). Unaccustomed to seeing our very own Nathan "Adventure Races Are Fun, Not Pure Insanity" S. in cycling clothes, we did not recognize him at first. After exchanging hellos and answering our questions (why wasn't he in Hot Springs? what was he doing out in Burns Park? why does my derailleur make a funny click click click sound?"), he joined our group as we sped off in the pursuit of life, liberty, happiness, Gatorade, and PowerBars.

After doing a few more circuits of the Burns Park region, a few of us decided we wanted a *real* challenge. Sort of like how a "real" man is...well, "real" stupid. Emerald Park was our target destination. We may not have the Alps here in Central Arkansas, but it might as well have been one for all intensive purposes. Before we set off on the narrow, rocky, steep trail to the summit, Nathan gave us some pointers. "Just keep pedaling on the switchbacks," "Just keep riding on the lowest gear and you'll be fine," he reminded us.

Off he zooms up the mountain and I quickly lose sight of him. About a quarter of the way up, I'm wishing for a newer, lighter aluminum mountain bike than my trusty STEEL steed of 7 years. Ok, I admit, I was actually wishing for a cablecar to take me the rest of the way. But after laboring and straining and laboring some more (geez, you think I was pregnant or something), I finally made it to the top where the We're-All-In-Much-Better-Shape-Than-You-Are-Cliff guys were waiting. As promised, it was worth it to ride to the top as the view from up there was spectacular.

And as the old adage goes, "what goes up, must come down." And come down we did. Flying at breakneck (not literally, thankfully) speeds, we flew down the other side of the mountain back to the River Trail below. That was the *other* reason it was worthwhile to ride to the top of Emerald Park. As any cyclist knows, the only other thing better than blowing by a Serious Biker (TM) is going as fast as you possibly can on your own bike. You know, the point where you're on your highest gear and can't possibly pedal any faster.

We all congregated at the bottom of the hill and planned our next destination - this time Gator's on the River in N. Little Rock. By now, the previously mentioned gentle, spring-like breeze has turned into a full-force, stop-you-dead-in-your-tracks-headwind. But with our fearless leader Nathan leading the way and the rest of us drafting behind him, it didn't pose much of a problem. That is, until they dropped me like a hot potato. For you cycling novices out there, "getting dropped" is essentially the equivalent of "being dumped" by a member of the opposite gender. As I couldn't keep up with their rapid pace (see we're-all-in-much-better-shape-than-you-are-Cliff guys above), I was slowly falling further and further back, now out of the draft and fighting the headwinds on my own. What doesn't destroy us makes us stronger right? At least that's what I was thinking to keep myself properly motivated.

We did all eventually meet up at Gator's with those who did the wise thing by *not* climbing to Emerald Park. And after taking a much-needed break, we bade farewell to Nathan and started back to Burns Park on our own. And again, I'd like to know *why* this happens (one of the mysteries of cycling I suppose) - how is that you can ride against a headwind in one direction, then turn around in the complete opposite direction only to go against another headwind?

We all made it back to our vehicles safe and sound, however, I wasn't sure my legs were going to make it the last few miles. What I thought was me sucking air and gasping was actually my thigh muscles screaming out in agony. And that last hill out of the Burns Park soccer complex - my thighs nearly mutinied right there on the spot. All in all, we had a great time and discussed how we needed to do that again *soon*. Just don't tell my thighs when we do decide. :)